Today we are going to meet with a friend’s dad who works in home loans to find out how much we qualify for. I know what we can afford and what we qualify for are two different things, so skip the lecture.
Truth is, I am very scared that we will not qualify for enough to be able to purchase something anytime soon. This will be due to the fact that I am now basically ‘self-employed’ since I’m only doing freelance right now. For self-employed individuals they want record of the last 2 years of income to include it as viable income towards loan qualification. So basically we will only be able to use E’s income to base this off of.
I’m scared. Although I feel very blessed to be able to live the way we are now, rent free, to save money- I am so very ready to get our own place. As much as I’ve grown more comfortable over the last three months, I still don’t feel like this is my home. I just want to have a place to call home with my husband, and the fact that this possibility is hanging in the balance is terrifying. I am the kind of person who can’t calm down and doesn’t feel settled until everything is in its place. We’ve been here three months, and there’s still boxes everywhere and not even half of my stuff is here. I just don’t feel settled and I hate that feeling.
Yes, we could move out and get an apartment just to be on our own, but we’re able to save so much more being here, as well as pay off some lingering debt that we have. It would just be a stupid decision, financially, to do so. But for the sake of my sanity? That’s another story. The possibility of not being able to buy something for 2 years makes me want to cry. Of course if I am able to find a full-time job that would help our chances- but I’ve been applying for things like crazy with no responses. Very discouraging.
I guess what I’m sayin’ is- please pray for us today! I’m hoping God proves me wrong and today is the start of a great adventure! But if for some reason things don’t go the way we hope, please pray for peace and patience for my heart. Because I’ll definitely need it.