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Bride-to-Be Faces Backlash for Not Making Wedding Accessible for Family Members

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Being considerate and thoughtful of your wedding guests is a key part of being a good host. Learn what happened when a bride refused to accommodate family members.

Two women screaming at each other.

Life has those situations where you cannot decide if you’re the villain or the hero who stands for what is right. A forum member, who we will call Penny, had one of those moments after she called out her sister for not providing family-friendly access to her wedding.

Brief Backstory

Disabled child in a wheelchair relaxing outside with a care assistant / Working with disability
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Penny is a single mother to Mia, who is a disabled child. Since birth, Mia has been using a wheelchair and needs constant assistance when awake. As she is an only parent, Penny is very protective of Mia.

Cassidy’s Wedding Logistics

Empty seats in wedding
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Penny has a sister named Cassidy, who is planning a beach wedding with her fiance Max. She recently called to let Penny know she planned a thirty-five-person ceremony at the beach near Penny’s city. This would be followed by a bonfire and barbecue at the same venue. Cassidy wanted to inform Penny of the logistics before sending an official invite because of Mia.

The Shock

Disappointed woman
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This news disappointed Penny, who thought her sister would check in with her before booking a venue that Mia could not access. She thinks Cassidy purposefully waited till everything was set in stone and there was no room for changes. Mia loves her auntie, and being unable to attend her wedding will be heartbreaking. Raising a special needs child alone is difficult; it’s even worse when your family is insensitive.

Mia Has To Pay To Attend

displeased annoyed woman
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After Penny explained her worries, Cassidy said they had checked whether the beach had a sand-friendly wheelchair. It was available for rent at a hundred and ten dollars per day. Penny was shocked at her sister’s audacity to ask a guest to pay to attend.

She also knew that Penny could not afford the rental fee. They refused to change the wedding venue as it had sentimental value. She and Max met at this location, got engaged there, and always dreamed about having their wedding at the same place.

We Don’t Support Inconsiderate Family

Two women screaming at each other.
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Penny proposed that Cassidy takes care of the rental fees, but she said they were on a tight budget and had to forgo many things. Penny talked to some moms with disabled children, who all said Cassidy didn’t want Mia at her wedding.

This is the perfect excuse. Penny is considering telling Cassidy that she won’t attend the wedding, as she cannot support someone unconcerned about her child’s needs.

Here’s what the internet had to say about the matter.

The Issue Is About the Payment

Disabled child in Beach
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Cassidy did everything necessary to ensure Mia could attend the wedding. A forum member indicates that checking if the location has a sand-friendly wheelchair is enough consideration.

They have an emotional connection to that beach, so their choice of venue is valid. The real dispute should be, “My sister will not pay a hundred ten dollars for a wheelchair for my child to attend her wedding.”

That’s Life

Upset Mom and daughter
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Sometimes you have to accept that you cannot do everything. A parent with a disabled child shares that being left out is difficult. Penny should step back and wish her sister the best.

Guests Have No Authority

Judgemental Sister
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How about letting Penny state her thoughts on the reception, catering, and all the wedding details? Many agree that it’s very telling for Penny to expect the bride and groom to run their venue selection by her.

It seems like people around her have catered to her needs a lot. Given a chance, she could make the whole wedding about her and Mia. But that’s not how weddings work. The couple does not need her approval, and she’s free not to attend the wedding if it doesn’t suit her needs.

Your Sister Has Her Own Life

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According to several commenters, Mia has not been excluded from the wedding. She has a wheelchair option. Understandably, Penny’s life revolves around her daughter, but that is not her sister’s reality.

It’s Not Your Wedding

wedding flowers
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Your child is your responsibility. A respondent writes that Penny needs to remember it’s her sister’s wedding, not hers or Mia’s. If she wants Mia to attend, it’s her job to make it happen, not her sister’s.

It’s Not Personal

Girl in wheel chair
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One person captures the fact that Cassidy’s intentions are not personal. It’s absurd for Penny to think her sister planned her wedding to ensure her daughter does not attend. It’s a tough situation, but Cassidy is not the villain that Penny is painting her to be.

It’s Okay To Be Upset

Upset Woman
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Finally, another guardian with a special needs child explains it’s okay for Penny to feel upset about the wedding, but expecting her sister to change the venue is too much.

They understand that every day comes with new challenges for parents with special needs children, but it’s best to make the most of every moment. Penny can ask if her sister can split the wheelchair cost, but deciding not to go is a mistake.

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