A Guest List Larger than We Wanted

When envisioning our wedding days as a young girl, I’m sure we have all pictured different things. From the decorations to the location, but no matter what you decide, the size of the guest list will have the biggest impact on your budget.

I knew having a big wedding was inevitable for me because I have a large family, and my fiance’s family has many close friends. Big to me meant 150 people. Well of course when discussing the guest list with both of our parents, the numbers kept increasing, so I agreed to 175 max! Then there’s a few people here and there that you may have forgotten, or your cousin wants to bring his girlfriend, now increasing the list to 200. That’s right, we went from 150 to 200 and it took much frustration and anxiety for me to finally accept this number. Now that we are nearly 2 months away from our wedding day, we are starting to get RSVP’s. I’ve read that approximately 20% of the guest list will say no, so I was happy expecting 180 yes’s. WELL, we’ve had 15 people say no so far, and this has opened up the floodgates yet again for the opportunity to invite more people. (Or so they think) Not only do you have a vision for your wedding, but so do your parents, and when the parents want a big wedding, there will be a fight to the end to invite as many people as possible.

guest listLet me share a with you a few scenarios we’ve had regarding the guest list.

Scenario 1:
Aunt + Uncle respond Yes but did not include my cousin in the reply. I email my Aunt to ask if said cousin will be coming. Aunt says he was going to talk to me personally and ask me something. (I know what this is about) Cousin text messages me to ask if he can bring his girlfriend (whom I have never met and he has only been dating 2 months). I say yes.

Scenario 2:
MIL gets a text message from a friend who asks if her daughter and son-in-law can come along to the wedding because they think it would be so fun. I laugh because I think she’s kidding. She’s not kidding. I say no.

Scenario 3:
I get an email asking if we can invite three more people who have been great customers of the business for over 20 years. So and so already said no, so could we just replace them with these guests? This one has been lingering for almost a week now…I’m undecided. I’ll probably cave and say yes because I’m sick of dealing with it.

Let’s just say that it’s going to be a never ending battle until the actual wedding day. Even then, people may just decide to show up if they feel like it. (Another response we got from one guest. Like are you kidding me?)

Sometimes I wish we could just elope.

Image via Style Me Pretty

guest list

Editor’s note: Due to the pandemic, some of the general wedding planning advice we share may not be applicable or possible due to restrictions on events. Please adhere to all current regulations and stay safe and healthy! Get more pandemic wedding resources here

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