15 Hilariously Awkward Song Choices for the First Dance at a Wedding
The first dance at a wedding is a romantic and memorable moment for the newlyweds. But what happens when the song choice is unexpectedly awkward or downright hilarious?
As wedding season quickly approaches, the topic of the perfect first dance wedding song comes up often. However, a recent online discussion yielded the exact opposite. Weddinggoers worldwide chimed in with their picks for the most awkward first dance songs – and it’s just as cringe as you could imagine!
1. “Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” – U2
Although it’s a masterpiece of a song, its decidedly gloomy and pessimistic lyrical content would cause alarm if this U2 hit was played during a first dance. Then, of course, you’d have much explaining to do to your newfound parents-in-law!
2. “Du Hast” – Rammstein
I can appreciate a metal thrasher as much as the next person, but “Du Hast” during your first dance? Wow. “One part of it roughly translates to ‘Will you be true to each other for all of your days, until death do you part?’ followed immediately by a strong ‘NO!'” reveals one person.
3. “Highway To Hell” – AC/DC
Never compare your wife or relationship to anything hell-related. It’s one of the all-time best singalong songs. But, if it’s played at your wedding, your future father-in-law may interrupt your first dance to give you a well-deserved punch in the stomach.
4. “You Give Love a Bad Name” – Bon Jovi
Bon Jovi has plenty of romantic songs suitable for a first dance. But, unfortunately, “You Give Love a Bad Name” is not one of them.
5. “It Wasn’t Me” – Shaggy
As one of the biggest pop hits of 2000, “It Wasn’t Me” climbed the charts and captivated millions. Due to its scandalous lyrical content, however, it would ruin a wedding even quicker than its ascent up the Billboard charts.
6. “Another One Bites the Dust” – Queen
This Queen classic makes for an excellent karaoke performance, but I advise against using it for a wedding. Instead, take it from somebody who knows. “It came on the radio as we drove away from getting the marriage license at the courthouse,” says one man whose marriage lasted mere months. “I should have known!”
7. “Must Be the Money” – Nelly
Here’s some advice: never heavily imply that you’re getting married because of your significant other’s wealth! Even if it’s true, keeping that information to yourself is best. Also, don’t be that person.
8. “No Children” – The Mountain Goats
While this cult classic is prevalent in certain musical circles, it doesn’t exactly scream, “We intend to bring children into this world.” Therefore, I recommend almost every other song ever instead of playing this track at a wedding!
9. “I Hate Everything About You” – Three Days Grace
A wedding is a joyous time to celebrate two people committing to a long and healthy marriage. However, I advise waiting until the divorce proceedings to unleash this particularly-bitter song onto your significant other in public.
10. “Every Breathe You Take” – The Police
Trust me; this song does not mean what you think it means. “The amount of people that think it’s a romantic song and play it at their wedding is amazing,” reveals one woman. “Even Sting himself has said finding out people think it’s a romantic song is worrying.”
11. “You’re Beautiful” – James Blunt
This James Blunt radio hit is a popular first dance song at weddings, but a small minority of people know the truth. It’s about unrequited love – the kind that never ends in marriage.
12. “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” – The Rolling Stones
If you’re trying to make an entire wedding shake their heads angrily during your first dance, make sure this Rolling Stones chart-topper plays. After all, nothing says “happy marriage” than making people think you are settling for less in your new relationship.
13. “Before He Cheats” – Carrie Underwood
Casting a dark cloud over the marriage near-instantaneously can be achieved by playing this Carrie Underwood song. Talk about putting negative juju into the air during your first dance!
14. “Headed For a Heartbreak” – Winger
Winger is a fantastic band, with their hair-band antics leading them into superstardom in the 80s. Unfortunately, Winger also has some of the worst songs to play at a wedding. That’s just the facts, people.
15. “Your Love” – The Outfield
This song is about having an affair. Need I say more? What do you think? Do you have an awkward suggestion to add to this list?
This thread inspired this post.
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