So this isn’t necessarily about saving money but it’s something that has been abundant in the bridal world lately and I wanted to share my personal take on it and my little DIY that I did to address our request at our ceremony.
I have found that with this wedding, we’ve come across a few tough decisions. I may not have experienced the “letting go” of a bridesmaid but I did have to ask a guest/once-upon-a-time-friend that it was best she not attend in light of some behavior that started the day we got engaged. But that’s not what this post is about. This one is about photography.
You’ve probably seen a few things out there on pinterest by now about photography and brides and grooms choosing to have an unplugged wedding. My initial reaction was *gasp* NO! As a guest I want to be snapping away …
The wedding photographer in me slapped the guest in me and said “Listen to yourself! That’s all you’ll be doing! You’ll be snapping pictures, not paying attention ‘fully’ to the ceremony, and you’ll be hiding behind a camera or phone the entire time. You won’t be ‘present’ and in the photos, you’re face will be covered by your own phone/camera and if you get antsy to get ‘that shot’ of your own, you’re going to get in the way of the professional photographer and possibly ruin the shot of the first kiss …let alone what their FLASH does to the pro’s photos!!! GAH!!!”
After said conversation with myself, I brought it up to my fiancé to see what his feelings on this were. I was surprised when he was totally on board to be “unplugged” at our ceremony. We both agreed – we don’t want everyone to be busy on their phones or even have them out for that matter. This is a BIG moment and we want them present and a part of this. Sure we’re doing this for us, but if we didn’t want them involved, we’d have gone to the courthouse. We invited you – we want you to put down the phones and cameras, stay in your seat, and listen. Let the guys who we hired be in charge of taking the photos.
Part two: going viral. We did NOT want photos of our ceremony posted all over Facebook before we even had a chance to see them, for one. Secondly, there are people who we did not invite to our wedding who I do not, I repeat DO NOT, want to see photos from our day. We are okay with photos from the reception posted online but the ceremony – it’s intimate, it’s private and it’s a part of our lives we are inviting only 80 people to be a part of. We will have photos to share with family who can’t make it and that’s why we have a videographer (a friend who works with me in my photography business who is working at a low rate for us). Point being, this is our wedding day – and it’s not a public affair to be broadcast over the internet and Facebook. On this, we both feel very VERY strongly.
Sure, Aunt D’s photos on her camera could get an angle the photographer didn’t grab … and I’ve had people say that their cousin’s wedding photographer didn’t get the first kiss and the only photo they have of that is from her camera she caught sitting in the front row. Kudos. Photography isn’t perfect, things go fast and yes, sometimes a photographer misses the kiss (so I tell my couples to always give me a nice long kiss, so I make sure I have it!). But this is a personal choice. One that we are not budging on.
There are TONS of apps out there to have people from your wedding upload photos and that’s awesome – I’d have no problem with that for the reception. There are signs at receptions that say “If you Instagram, use the hashtag #BLABLAWEDDING”. The thing is, as much as the internet and social networking is a part of our world, for our “middle of nowhere” wedding in the middle of the woods, I honestly want nothing more than to be completely unplugged and disconnected from social media for that day. And that includes my guests.
I even made a sign on a chalkboard that will be posted at the ceremony entrance …. I think it is a nice way of saying “put it away”.
How about you? What are your feelings on being “unplugged” at your wedding?
Editor’s note: Due to the pandemic, some of the general wedding planning advice we share may not be applicable or possible due to restrictions on events. Please adhere to all current regulations and stay safe and healthy! Get more pandemic wedding resources here.