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What I Learned from My Best Friend's Wedding

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One way to get some insight into your own wedding planning journey is to take notes of what you see at other weddings you attend. Check out one bride-to-be’s lessons learned from attending her best friend’s wedding.

my best friends wedding
Erin Zimmerman
my best friends wedding
Image via Canva

Apologies if your mind went immediately to the popular rom-com movie, My Best Friend’s Wedding. In this case, I’m talking about my *actual* best friend’s big day.

Shortly before my own wedding day, my beautiful best friend got married. Being a part of her special day was such an incredible honor, and also a learning experience for me, as a soon-to-be-bride.

After taking part in her big day, I made note of some things that I loved, as well as some things I hope for on my own wedding day. Here are some lessons that I learned after being a bridesmaid in my best friend’s wedding.

1) Make the wedding day fun!

Though the sacrament is serious, the rest should be fun! Try to think through ways you can make the experience as enjoyable as possible, not just for yourself, but also your wedding party. Whether that’s playing music or games in the morning while getting ready or having surprises for your bridesmaids, little touches go a long way to make your wedding party feel appreciated. I hope that our wedding is half as fun as my best friend’s wedding was. It was a blast!

2) Try to relax.

I hope that I can be as relaxed as my best friend was. I have honestly never seen a more relaxed bride! It was as if she knew for certain that everything was going to fall into place, simply because everyone she loved was there and ready to help out.

During the “getting ready” part of the day, she had super cute bridesmaids’ robes that she had monogrammed for all of us. It was such a sweet touch that added to the chill vibe of the morning!

Even when we realized her veil had been left with the woman who did her alterations, she knew we would figure something out. (Luckily, we were able to retrieve it, though the process might have involved “breaking” into her house! Didn’t expect that to land on my list of bridesmaids’ duties!)

3) Find the balance

My fiancé Nick talked about how relaxed and comfortable everything about the wedding was. He described it as this amazing balance between a beautiful wedding that wasn’t overly casual, yet you felt relaxed like it was just a party. It truly was so comfortable and didn’t feel like this overly pressure-filled event. Their wedding was so *them*… serious when it needed to be, fun when it could be, and of course, an amazing after party!

4) You won’t remember the little things.

I don’t know if it’s because I was in the wedding party or what, but I could barely tell you the details of the day. This includes what we ate, what song they danced to for their first dance, if there were flowers on all the tables, what the place cards looked like, etc. I’m sure I overlooked some of these details in part because of my bridal party duties. During the time I might have had a chance to look at them, we were having our photos taken or being introduced into the reception. But this realization, in particular, made me think about what is really worth spending money on!

5) Location is important. As is Photography.

I hope that my wedding photos turn out as beautiful as their photos will be, thanks to their choice of venue. They had the most amazing setting on the groom’s grandmother’s farm. From photos against a steel grain bin to a wood-shuttered barn and, of course, a red barn. They are going to be amazing and I cannot wait to see them. Luckily for me, we booked the same photographer. Feeling comfortable with your wedding photographers is key when it comes to capturing good photos.

6) Have the right people standing with you

This is something I realized before my best friend’s wedding, but her day really solidified it for me. I thought about having friends in my wedding who had made me a part of theirs, even though I’m not as close with some of them. In the end, I decided to have my sister, two best friends, and my soon-to-be sister-in-law. I know that these people will support me through the process of getting ready for the wedding and on the day of. Not only will they support me, but they will make it fun!!

7) Budget for a honeymoon.

My best friend’s wedding was an absolutely fabulous time that only made me look forward to getting married even more than before! It also made me realize that budgeting for a honeymoon is something I want to prioritize. I was exhausted after the wedding weekend… and it wasn’t even my wedding! All the running around, nerves, drinks, and laughs completely wiped me out. I couldn’t imagine how we’d feel after our own wedding. It really solidified for me how important it will be for us to take some intentional downtime after the big day. I think we’ll need to get away for a few days even if it’s not somewhere with a white sandy beach and crystal clear water!

What have you learned from friend’s weddings you’ve attended or been a part of?


Erin Zimmerman

is a teacher living in Baltimore, MD. She got married 2012 in Ocean City, MD. You can read her wedding planning posts here.