Picking an Officiant

Happy Holidays to all of you beautiful brides out there!!

I hope you and yours spend plenty of quality time together with each other and your families during this exciting time in your life

After all, family is what it’s all about. 

It’s the week of Christmas, but guess what.. that wedding is still getting closer and closer [cue slight meltdown]. I got engaged exactly one year ago this past Sunday, and remembering how I felt on that day made me remember what all of this craziness is all about – two people who are making a vow to spend the rest of their lives together.

I wanted to share with you one of the things that I have struggled with secretly from day one. You see, I am not a member of a Church, nor am I a very religious person. Spiritual – just not religious (Yes.. I live in the Bible belt and I am admitting that!). J was raised in a Church with his family and I would say he is a happy medium – not too extreme for us to clash about it. So, that being said-most people in the south [and maybe everywhere else] have the preacher from their Church marry them. This is really the first time in my life that I felt the struggle of not being a religious person.

The next most logical thing is to hire an “officiant.” They may or may not be from a church, religious or nonreligious, and are licensed to perform marriages and funerals. They charge varying amounts of money depending on the length of your ceremony, how far they have to travel, if they are needed at the rehearsal dinner, etc. I found that the average price is about 300 dollars per wedding (Where do I sign up to do this?) and most ceremonies are completely customized. I called several, and even met with two – but for some reason they just felt so… cheesy. For the life of me, I could not understand the point of having someone that does not even know us perform the most important ceremony of our lives!

And that next weekend (after meeting with two officiants throughout the week), I attended a friend’s wedding. The ceremony was SO sweet, and it was performed by someone that knew both the groom and bride, and he was just a normal person – not a priest, or someone who conducts weddings regularly. It turns out, ANYONE can become an officiant.

And guess what…


I knew I had found the solution to my problem! That is until I racked my brain for two weeks thinking of people who would fit all of the qualities we wanted! We want our ceremony to be beautiful and serious, but have a tad bit of wit and comedy. I would think of one person and then decide…. no – no one would take them seriously, they are too funny. I would think of another person… no – he doesn’t really know J that well. And so on and so forth until I was discussing my dilemma with my Matron of Honor. I finally reached out for help and guess what… Her husband was already licensed! It turns out that a couple of his friends had asked him to do their wedding and so he got licensed, but they ended up eloping. P is witty, smart, and doesn’t get nervous speaking in front of crowds. Myself, J, H and P hang out ALL THE TIME! You cannot imagine the relief I felt.

I really want to make the way that I ask him special, though. Check back next week and I will tell you how I am going to do it 🙂
Did you have trouble selecting someone, or did you have someone that you absolutely loved?? What sort of things did you include in your ceremony.. I am going to need all the help I can get. And, hey – asking for help isn’t all that bad 


If this interests you, anyone you know can become licensed to perform weddings here, but make sure you check the laws within your state first . Have you had a tough time picking an officiant?

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